Selected publications.
LOS ANGELES TIMES ⎮ MARY MCDANIEL CAIL
Online, November 19, 2014 • Print, November 20, 2014, A-15
Op-Ed “How to care for caregivers”
Some 39% of adults serve as full- or part-time caregivers to a loved one struggling with a disease or disability. You almost certainly know one of them. But do you know what kind of strain they are under? And are you making any effort to support them?
THE MIAMI HERALD ⎮ MARY MCDANIEL CAIL
November 7, 2015
Op-Ed “He may be naked, but I’m only looking at his wrinkles”
HIGHLIGHTS
Friends can confer dignity upon dementia patients
It's the best expression of our humanity
As a culture we seem overly concerned, at least the baby boomers among us, with wrinkle prevention. We have the soft approach: creams, scrubs and lotions. We have the serious stuff: lasers, botox, fillers, surgery and some ominous sounding choices, like carboxytherapy, which might not raise eyebrows if listed among the service items of an auto repair shop. While I’m not criticizing or holding myself aloft from this obsession, I had an insight recently about wrinkles and how they might contribute to dignity.
“Sincere thanks to Mary McDaniel Cail for her excellent Nov. 8 column, ‘He may be naked, but I’m only looking at his wrinkles.’
Both of my parents developed dementia at the end of their lives, and over my years in ordained ministry, I have called on many parishioners who whipped off their clothes as soon as someone covered them up. That has never been a problem for me—dignity is a lot deeper than being covered. So now, being the older generation, I have some concerns for my own care when I can’t hold it together anymore.
The one thing for which I pray is to be cared for by caring people, as I’ve seen too many less-than-caring caretakers. I trust that part of their caring will be recognizing my dignity—clothed or unclothed.
I’ve never read a more professional and compassionate article on a sensitive and totally human subject.”
THE CHICAGO TRIBUNE ⎮MARY MCDANIEL CAIL
January 18, 2015, Lifestyle, page 5
“Providing Support When a Caregiver Requires Care”
Abstract: If you're putting in 168 hours of on-call time per week tending a person who is unable to manage without you, you're probably too drained to take the initiative to call a friend, and you're worried about coming across as too pessimistic or inviting a storm of unwanted advice if you do.
THE MOCKINGBIRD ⎮MARY CAIL
Summer, 2017, pages 104–109: The Love and Death Issue
Essay “My Darkest Hour”
MARIA SHRIVER • ARCHITECTS OF CHANGE MARY CAIL
Tips for Transformation and InspirationTips for Transformation and InspirationTips for Transformation and InspirationTips for Transformation and InspirationTales of Alzheimer's and CaregivingTales of Alzheimer's and CaregivingTakeaways from the SexesOn a MissionTHE HUFFINGTON POST ⎮MARY MCDANIEL CAIL⎮Articles & Related Links
“‘Invisible’ Purple Communities”
Fifty Aug 28, 2014
Read More: Walk-to-End-Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's Disease, February 26 2014 Senate Appropriations Subcommittee on Labor, Dementia, Francis Collins, Alzheimer's Association, Health and Human Resources, Seth Rogen, Fifty News
What a different world it would be for people whose lives have been upended by Alzheimer's disease if they felt the support of everyone, friends and strangers alike.
“Solace With the Solstice”
Healthy Living Jun 20, 2014
Read More: Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's Disease, Awareness, Comfort, Disease, Healthy Living, Solstice, Summer Solstice, Healthy Living News
We need months and days when we are faced with the reality of a hardship we might not share or fully understand. A few friends who join forces and give increments of time steadily can bring about meaningful relief in a situation that may provide little chance for it otherwise.
“What do Wrinkles Have to Do with Dementia?”
Community Jun 20, 2014
Read More: Health Post50, Caregiving, Wrinkles, Fifty, Alzheimer’s Disease
Begin to believe that you might handle the situation, that you can override your past conditioning and awkwardness. See in your friend’s wrinkles the testimony to an adult life of good humor, thoughtfulness, determination, achievement, concern — even if he or she cannot otherwise show these qualities anymore. There should be no loss of dignity in dementia. Challenge, perhaps heartbreak and fear, but not shame or loss of dignity.
HUFFPOST ⎮ MARY MCDANIEL CAIL
“‘Keeping’ Alzheimer's During the New Year”
Jan 9, 2017
At the beginning of the holiday season, President Obama gave his final remarks at a White House Christmas tree lighting ceremony. He spoke about the commonality in the Christmas story message, which asks each of us, whatever views we profess, to be our brother’s and sister’s keeper.